How I Met My Psychiatrist
by amcswain
Summary: Ted is having strange dreams, and no one seems to care. Is this just another Ted thing or is something really up?


"I woke up from a strange dream last night" I told Barney.

"What? Robin actually said I love you back on your first date? Ha! Does seem pretty weird," he jokes. Yeah that would be strange.

"Ha-ha, but like I've told you countless times before, I'm over Robin. Things don't work out and it's that simple."

"So that wasn't you crying in your bedroom the night after Robin said she needed some time off, and was going to Argentina?"

"Uh anyways, the dream that I had-" but I was interrupted by Barney's "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" ringtone.

"Nice, a booty call, -Hello? Hillary! How are you?! Oh this is Meagan? That's what I meant- Ted I gotta go." And he's gone. Despite my slight feeling of disgust, the dream I had is still prominent in my mind. I was in a completely white room, I felt trapped, and like I had just woken up from a deep sleep, so deep it seemed close to death.

"Woah there buddy, no need to be so morbid," Marshall said from behind me, so of course it scares me and I scream high and loud, causing Marshall to laugh. But did I really say all that out loud? Weird. I guess I'm 30 going on 80.

"Ted? Hello?"

"Yeah what's up?"

"I was asking you if you wanted to come down to the bar? Lily and Barney are already down there."

"I though Barney had some other business to attend to?"

"Well I guess not. You coming or not?"

"Sure." We head down and things are going pretty good. As we all are sitting in our booth, I remember my dream.

"So guys, I had this dream last night, I can't stop thinking about it and hopefully you can tell me what it means," I tell everyone.

"Shoot," replies Lily.

"Okay, so I wake up and I'm in this white room. Kind of like a hospital, you know? But I couldn't get out of-" Barney cuts me off with a

"Ted, my boy. Let's stop worrying about these dreams. You see that brunette sitting at the bar? That's who you should be worrying about."

"Well, it was just so weird-"

"Ted! What did I just say?!"

"Okay, okay fine. How do I look?"

"Like you're 30 going on 80."

"Wait what?" How did he know exactly what I said to myself upstairs?

"I said you look like a retired teacher, now let's go!" Now I'm hearing things. I would make the 30 going on 80 joke but it seems to be getting old. Anyways, Barney and I walk up to the girl he was talking about and he taps her on the shoulder and does the whole "Have you met Ted?" ordeal like usual. But she turns around, and it's Robin.

"Robin? I thought you were in Argentina?"

"What?" She seems confused, why is she confused?

"What are you doing here? When did you get back? You only left a couple days ago," I feel a sharp pinch on the inner side of my elbow, right where it bends. I look back up from my arm to see Robin calmly inserting a needle.

"Robin what are you doing?!" I try to back away, but a mattress stops me-I'm in a bed and Robin is in scrubs telling me everything will be okay.

She stops to say, "Ted, you're in a mental hospital. My name is Anne and I need to give you an IV, so this shot is numbing your skin. You won't eat so you need this IV for nutrients." Okay, I'm having another dream again. This one is just like the last, I'm in the same white room and I'm strapped to the bed. God I hope Marshall wakes me up soon. But this so-called nurse looks exactly like Robin. I guess I do miss her if she's popping up in my dreams. All of a sudden, Barney walks in dressed as a doctor. Man this dream is getting out of hand. There's no way Barney would willingly help people like this.

"Hey Ted, how's it going? I'm going to need you to take this pill so it will help you sleep okay?"

"Uh sure haha doctor sir," I can't help but laugh to myself after seeing Barney like this. As I do, he gives Robin a side glance and I throw the pill under the sheet. There's no way I'm trusting anything Barney gives me, even in a dream.

" , his schizophrenia is still precedent. Every time he wakes up, he mumbles on about this being a dream," I overhear Robin tell Barney.

"Well let's continue with our daily care plan, and whatever you do, don't bring up his past. We'll lose all progress of recovery we've made so far," Barney replies.

My past? I try to think back as far as I can but I can only think back to my first date with Robin. That's it. Not even what my parents look like. Man this dream is really messing with my head. I try and wake up, but I have no luck. I want to remember my past. I want to know.

"But what did happen to him doctor? How did he end up like this?" Robin's questions make me realize they're still in the room. They turn to look at me and I close my eyes, pretending to be asleep due to the pill. Barney waits a little bit before he speaks, and I think they take my bait.

"Well, it's his schizophrenia. It progressively got worse, and we didn't get him until it caused Ted to be at his worst. He lived with his friend and his friend's finance." Ha! Marshall and Lily. I knew this was a dream.

"But in his head, he had three room mates. His friend knew something was wrong when Ted tried to convince him that his now wife was having an affair with their other room mate. He didn't do anything about it though he knew they didn't have another room mate." What? But that's what happened. I saw it myself. But what happened after Lily cheated on Marshall? I wish I could remember.

"Things became very tense and awful very quickly. Ted believed he had an architecture job but really went to an abandoned building everyday. Hi made up room mate started to convince him to do things. He became very paranoid and believed his real room mates were against him." What the hell is going on? Why is this more realistic than real life? Why can't I wake up? My actual past starts rushing back into my head.

"One night his made up room mate pushed him so far to think he had to do something about his actual room mates being against him. So he did. He murdered both of them in his sleep. Of course neighboring apartments heard the gunshots and-"

"I had to do what I had to do," I told him. "they were going to kill me if I didn't kill them first." It's the truth. I knew they had something planned against me the whole time. Those bastards. "I had to do what I had to do, I had to do what I had to do, I HAD TO DO WHAT I HAD TO DO." I did, I really did. So why am I tied down for it? Why am I in this place? Why are they doing this to me? I tried to get up, but I have no luck. This makes me mad, enraged even.

"Nurse, we need to sedate him."

"No, no, no, no!" I scream. They can't do this. I did the right thing. No more needles. But even so, I feel the sharp stick in my arm again. Everything goes black.

I wake up, and I'm in my bed at home. Oh thank god, and what a weird dream! I can't remember much but a white room, and feeling trapped. I go to the kitchen, and Barney's there.

"I woke up from a strange dream last night," I told Barney.

"What? Robin actually said I love you back on your first date? Ha! Does seem pretty weird." he jokes.

Yeah that would be strange.


End file.
